영유아기는 현실과 환상을 구별하는 능력이 부족해 거짓말을 하는 경우가 있습니다. 또한 착한 사람은 나쁜 행동을 하지 않는다는 흑백논리를 갖기 쉽기 때문에 자신의 나쁜 행동을 숨기기 위해 거짓말을 하는 경우도 있지요. 아이의 계속되는 거짓말, 어떻게 지도해야 할까요?
속는 척, 재밌는 척을 하지 마세요
부모가 아이의 거짓말을 재밌어 하거나 알고도 속는 척을 해주다 보면 아이는 점점 더 현실과 상상을 구분하지 못해 계속 이야기를 지어냅니다. 재미 삼아 거짓말을 한다면 별다른 반응을 보이지 말아주세요.
사실을 말할 수 있게 도와주세요
반복된 거짓말의 가장 큰 이유는 야단맞는 것이 두려워서입니다. 자신이 사랑받고 있음을 확신시켜주며 정직하게 이야기하면 용서받을 수 있다는 점도 알려주세요. 그리고 스스로 고백하는 것은 용기 있는 행동이라고 칭찬해주시기 바랍니다.
“거짓말쟁이야” “나쁜 아이야”라고 말하지 마세요
거짓말 하는 것과 아이의 인성 자체를 동일시하는 것은 안됩니다. 아이의 본성을 나쁘게 오해하지 말고 충분히 착하고 정직한 행동을 할 수 있다는 것을 인식시켜주세요.
가정법과 의문문을 사용해보세요
“나는 하늘을 날 수 있어!”라는 아이에게 가정법과 의문문을 사용해 “저기 멋진 새처럼 하늘을 훨훨 날고싶은 거구나?”라며 현실과 상상을 구분하게 도와줍니다.
일관된 태도를 유지해주세요
기분에 따라 아이의 거짓말을 대하는 태도가 바뀌어서는 안 됩니다. 평소 일관된 태도를 유지해주세요.
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